New home, same life

Window View Diamond
View from my front window at sunrise.

 

My family and I finally moved into our house in the Diamond New Housing Scheme. I can’t say that I like it nor can I say I hate it. The traveling is hard and the morning traffic is harder but the place has a certain quietness to it that I like.

It’s been a long time since my mother, younger brother and I have shared a home together. At my age, I think I’ve spent too much time chasing life and chasing causes and not enough time seeing the people I love. A big part of loving people is witnessing their lives and caring about what you witness. I’ve been working on it.

And of course, I’ve got some interesting neighbours and naturally I’ve got that one neighbour that’s the epitome of jackassifiyishness. Almost every weekend they vibrate my windows with their huge music box while their battalion of children back-ball and juk the floor, the wall and each other. Sigh. I’m trying hard to mind my own business.

Just before the rain started this morning, I helped my mom wash. We used blue-soap, hard-brush and scrubbing-board. These days I look forward to washing with mom. I’ve seen her age these last few years and it forced me to accept that my time with her is not endless. Time is not endless for us.

I wait up for my brother at nights now and we do dumb things or watch pointless TV. I’m watching him become a man and I know that I won’t always be around to witness his life first hand. There’s no telling where life will take us. My mother’s eldest sister has lived in another country for most of their lives and they haven’t seen each other in years. One day, distance may stretch between my brother and I and we’ll fill that space with memories and Skype and annual visits.

This is also the first time in more than 15 years that I haven’t lived with Nani. She is there in her house and I am here in mine. Sometimes, it feels as if our worlds are not the same and never were and never could be but every now and then we meet and we laugh. Laughing makes everything better.

Life will never be perfect and happiness is not constant. But who wants that? Seriously, perfect and constant are predictable and boring.

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